When a Celebrity Steals Your Man

It is bad enough when just any old girl steals your boyfriend but it really hurts when it is a celebrity. That is because celebrities have so much power. They have money too and they can do things to really hurt you if you just try and do something like contact like the guy. They can also accuse you of stalking because of their celebrity status which is quite grotesque if all you are trying to do is get him to pay his electric bill or back rent.

A friend of my older sister’s recently had her boyfriend stolen by a celebrity and she is such a witch I would never mention her name here. In fact it was more than just her boyfriend it was her husband and she had two kids by him. Both him and her are in their late thirties and mildly successful at acting. Well, he happened to have a part as an extra in a movie this starlet was appearing in and somehow he fell for her charms. Her charms are few by the way. She is one of those actresses who has a famous television film producer for a father and only has a career because Daddy gave her a part in his telegrams. Furthermore she is also one of the richest girls in the world and grew up in a home so pampered that her mother kept not one, but two rooms in which the two of them would wrap presents.

My friend’s husband never told her about the affair he was having an affair with this blonde haired bimbo of an actress (who I think has the face of a horse). She found out by seeing pictures of them getting tattoos with each other’s names and portraits in a local tabloid. Once those came out he refused to talk to her from the film location. After that all she looked at was pictures of stolen kisses taken by paparazzi. That just had to hurt.

I think that if a major celebrity steals your man and that if they have a lot of money that they should at the very least pay you off. Here is our friend who is a single mom raising two kids while her deadbeat husband goes off with this poor little rich girl who is now pregnant and featuring the two of them in a reality series. There is no thought at all to the pain she is cueing others, especially these two young children. She needs to pay the wife and kids their living expenses. Their mother, who is an actress in her own right but not as famous because she is Canadian is now deeply depressed and finding it hard to work. Little Miss L.A. Nepotism needs to pay for that.

What kind of Christmas does this rich actress thing the three of them (his real family) had without their Dad on the scene? What is even worse is that on her reality television we all have to look at this two faced man stealer with her swollen breasts and pregnant stomach. What a cow!

 

Worst Pick Up Lines Ever

What dating blog like this would not be complete without a compendium of the world’s worst pick up lines. Here they are in all of their rotten stinking glory.

Classics

I’m here. What are your other two wishes?

Hi, do you want to have my children. If not, can we just practice.

Baby, I’m an American Express Lover! Don’t go home without me!

Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?

The only thing your eyes haven’t told me is your name.

You with all those curves and me with no brakes!

Did the sun just come out or did you just smile at me.

Oh no, I’m choking! I need mouth-to-mouth, quick!

How do you like your eggs in the morning?

Come here often?

What is a beautiful girl like you doing in a place like this?

Sex is a killer…want to die happy?

Of all the bars in the world I could have walked into, here you are…

Does God know you’ve escaped from heaven?

You look like someone I know.

Can I see your tan lines?

I miss my teddy bear. Would you sleep with me?

Do you come here often?

Congratulations! You’ve been voted “Most Beautiful Girl in This Room” and the

grand prize is a night with me!

Wanna get lucky?

Do you know, your hair and my pillow are perfectly color coordinated?

Help the homeless. Take me home with you!

You know what’d look good on you? Me.

I think I could fall madly in bed with you.

Bond. James Bond.

Done To Death

Your place or mine?

If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?

I think, I’d make you very happy!

Smile if you want to sleep with me.

Smile if you want to sleep with me

If I said you had a great body, would you hold it against me?

Is it hot in here or is it just you?

Baby, you must be a broom, cause you just swept me off my feet.

Didn’t I see you on the cover of Glamour magazine?

Aren’t you a famous model?

If I could arrange the alphabet I would put U and I together.

There’s something wrong with my eyes – I can’t take them off you.

I’d really like to see how you look when I’m naked.

Do you sleep on your stomach or can I?

I’ll cook you dinner if you cook me breakfast.

Real Eyerollers

What’s your sign? (response: Stop!)

Nice dress. Can I talk you out of it?

That dress would look great – on my bedroom floor.

I am a magical being, take off your bra.

I feel like Richard Gere because I’m standing next to the Pretty Woman.

Are you free tonight, or will it cost me?

Let’s play gynecologist.

Let’s go to my place and do the things! I’ll tell everyone we did anyway.

I’m gonna have sex with you tonight so, you might as well be there

Read any good books lately?

Seen any good movies lately?

So..what do you do for a living?