I was thinking it might be time to marry myself instead of waiting to marry someone else. Who needs a man when you can buy a big bling for yourself? I can probably afford a better ring for myself than any of the men that I have met lately.

Some women who buy these big shiny rings are calling them cocktail rings. But what they are really rings for women without fiancées. Everywhere you look, it is the single young women who seem to be sporting the largest, shiniest crystal (fake or real) on the fourth finger of their right hand. These glittering channel bands, or diamond solitaires set in stars, hearts and flower shapes are especially popular with celebrities. Everyone from Paris Hilton to Courtney Love to Pamela Anderson is wearing these.

The diamond companies call these the Right Hand Ring and they are marketing them to young women like me like crazy. They are trying to charge us between 1,500 and $7,000 to wear something quite bridal looking. According to an ad I saw in Vanity Fair, the DeBeers Diamond Trading calls this ring “a symbol “of the strength, success and independence of the woman of the twenty-first century.” I am not sure if I want to fall for that.

It is more of a symbol of materialism rather than anything. Does this mean that the larger the diamond is that you buy for yourself the more committed you are to yourself? Can’t a woman just be committed to herself without spending half of a down payment on a condo on the concept?

The DeBeers had says, “Woman of the world, raise your right hand!” The ad copy says that raising your right hand is a declaration of independence. What does extending the third finger of your right hand mean? Is the insult weaker if you have a big DeBeers bling on it? I guess I’m not feeling that great about diamonds after watching Blood Diamond.

These Right Hand rings are usually pretty expensive – much more than any diamond chip found in the local People’s jeweler in the mall. These diamond rings are nice but I will settle for a great big fake or a semi-precious stone like an aquamarine or a topaz. The nicest ones are the big emerald cut semi-precious stones that are practically the size of a domino.

I guess this idea is good for spinsters who know there is no chance of marriage but still want a ring. It is also good for women who did get married but don’t like the cheap ass ring their husband got them. Maybe that’s why Posh Spice and Madonna own Right Hand Blings as well as the usual left hand ring. Maybe they are just trying to one up the spinsters by getting rocks that are even bigger.

You don’t have to wear a right hand ring to express independence. Many friends of mine wear a diamond ring, either given in engagement or passed down from a loving grandmother, just because they have liked the stone or the way it feels on their hand. And that is the best reason to wear it.