Don’t Let the Losers Get You Down

Whenever something bad happens to you; whether it is work related or relationship related do you spend the next few hours weeks or months beating yourself up about it? This is one way to make rejection form men way too important.

If a reject is work, social or relationship related; do you spend the next few hours, days, weeks, months (or a lifetime) beating yourself up about it? I have good news! You can stop being this way right now.

How?

Simple. Choose not to react in your old habitual ways. Stop your automatic tendency to make it all about you. It is not about you.

No one is holding a gun to your head. You can make the choice to NOT let bad things affect you and essentially give up this self-defeating behavior.

I know this will come as a complete surprise to some of you. I know it did for me. Look at your negative responses and how you continue to dwell on them and I think you’ll be shocked to learn that this serves no real purpose. Once you realize

this, then you can begin to reverse the process.

A guy friend recently told me a story that illustrates this point perfectly:

He walked up to a girl in a group and said,

“I saw you staring at me (she actually wasn’t) so

I thought I’d come over and introduce myself.”

She blew him off immediately. So, without missing

a beat, he turned to one of her friends and said,

“How are YOU doin?”

She says,

“Great”.

They talk for a minute, he takes her over to a couch and they start making out. A few minutes later, the girl who blew him off comes over, sits down and wants to have a group kiss…then they ask him to leave with them.

This is because women always want what other women want. I can tell you this is true because I have gone out with some real jerks and nobody has ever even looked twice at them until they have appeared on my arm. This is true of guys who are not good looking, guys with a lousy job and guys who stammer and stutter.

When you suffer from events that are beyond your control, it makes your suffering much worse if you regard yourself as a victim. Since most of your emotional experiences are the direct result of how you interpret and personalize the events in your own lives, the important factor is the skill with

Which you handle your own response. It’s your own choice how you respond.

The key is to revise your attitude to blame things more on the situation rather than take the entire rap yourself. Give yourself a break. You can’t help it if one guy is an arrogant jerk, the next one a sex addict and the one after that a non-committing type. Don’t make a drama out of each and every dating disaster and you will be much better off.

Try it and let me know what happens!

 

The Meaning of Gemstones

As Christmas is coming it might occur to some men out there to give jewelry as a gift for Christmas.

Below is a list of popular gemstones and their meaning. You can also wear these stones on your person to help dispel any problems you are having in personal relationships.

Sapphire: This stone, which is usually the color of the deep, blue sea, corresponds to the energies of the Archangel Michael. Michael protects you from forces antithetical to love such as violence and lust. The sapphire can help women select an appropriate husband.

Rose Quartz: This light pink crystal heals the heart and promotes a sense of self-appreciation, and self-love. It also helps you open your heart’s center so that you can give love, unconditionally without any expectation of a reward in return. It improves your mood and enhances feelings of joy.

Diamond: Diamonds have traditionally symbolized the commitment of one human being to another, but in this case they also symbolize a commitment to taking care of your Higher Self. The stone vibrates at a frequency that strengthens your intuitive abilities. It helps you perceive beyond surface appearance and understand the truth about another person.

Emerald: This brilliant green stone is used to restore balance. Healers use this an anti-stress stone and to restore harmony to troubled or split personalities. Traditionally, an emerald was also thought to help you learn lessons, so you don’t repeat mistakes in your love life. Its deep sea green color is reminiscent of the subconscious, so it can assist in the manifestation of appropriate relationships in your life.

Ruby: The blood red light of the ruby helps to dispel feelings of discouragement and self-doubt and infuse your heart, mind and aura with love. This is the stone to wear if you feel like you are drowning in self-pity. It dispels negative self-talk and is thought to increase confidence and beauty. . It can help you achieve a vibrant social life and attract the right friends.

Amethyst: This beautiful purple stone that helps you let go of past hurts and relationships. It will help you access the truth that will set you free. If you are a control freak, this is the gem that will help you ‘Let Go and Let God’. Amethysts help release fears and anxieties that might be lurking in your subconscious and preventing you from moving forward by bringing them to the surface. It helps release fear and anxiety and also reduces tension and stress in the body.

Clothing that feels nice against the skin such as muslins and silks also make great romantic gifts because they make your lover feel sexy. To put your love in the mood also think of giving them incense or candles made from such scents as vanilla, cherry or sandalwood.

 

Learning to Forgive and Forget

If you are going to stay sane in this crazy old world and especially if you are going to continue dating then you need to learn to let go every now and then.

Although anger at times is an effective tool in dealing with difficult situations, if used too often, it loses impact. For if you are always angry, no one can tell the difference between when it is “real” and when it is just a “knee jerk” reaction. So they will tend not to take you seriously if you are always angry… compounding your frustration.

The first step in the journey toward forgiveness is the realization that anger is most often born out of ignorance.

Here is a list of ways you can be ignorant about your own anger.

· You are unaware of all the facts or are misinformed.

· You have false judgments or unrealistic expectations about the situation.

· You are really angry with yourself but are taking it out on someone else.

· The anger relates to unresolved past pain and not to what “caused” it now.

· The anger is 100% justified based upon what others

· The final step in the journey towards forgiveness is to routinely practice “better responses to anger”

Forgiveness is a form of realism. It doesn’t deny, minimize, or justify what others have done to us or the pain that we have suffered. It encourages us to look squarely at those old wounds and see them for what they are. And it allows us to see how much energy we have wasted and how much we have damaged ourselves by not forgiving.

Forgiveness is an internal process. It can’t be forced, and it doesn’t come easy. It brings with it great feelings of wellness and freedom.

Forgiveness is a sign of positive self-esteem. We no longer identify ourselves by our past injuries and injustices. We are no longer victims. We claim the right to stop hurting when we say, “I’m tired of the pain, and I want to be healed.” At that moment, forgiveness becomes a possibility-although it may take time and much hard work before we finally achieve it.

Forgiveness is letting go of the past. It doesn’t erase what happened, but it does allow us to lessen and perhaps even eliminate the pain of the past. The pain from our past no longer dictates how we live in the present, and it no longer determines our future.

It also means that we no longer need resentment and anger as an excuse for our shortcomings. We don’t need them as a weapon to punish others nor as a shield to protect ourselves by keeping others away. And most importantly, we don’t need these feelings to identify who we are. We become more than merely victims of our past.

Forgiveness is no longer wanting to punish those who hurt us. It is understanding that the anger and hatred that we feel toward them hurts us far more than it hurts them. It is discovering the inner peace that becomes ours when we let go of the past and forget vengeance.

 

Gemstones for Attracting Love

I ran across this interesting article by Samantha Stevens, author of Creating Love and with her permission I have a list here of the types of gemstones that you can wear or carry to attract love.

Sapphire: This stone protects you from forces antithetical to love such as violence and lust. The sapphire can help women select an appropriate husband.

Yellow Topaz: This clear yellow gem is the ‘problem-solving stone’. This stone is also good for those who feel ‘numbed by disappointment’. It allows codependents to release drunken or abusive partners. It can also help obsessive people learn to let go. It helps you recognize your patterns and see the ‘big picture’ in life.

Rose Quartz: This light pink crystal heals the heart and promotes a sense of self-appreciation, and self-love. It also helps you open your heart’s center so that you can give love, unconditionally without any expectation of a reward in return. It improves your mood and enhances feelings of joy.

Diamond: Diamonds have traditionally symbolized the commitment of one human being to another. It helps you perceive beyond surface appearance and understand the truth about another person.

Emerald: This brilliant green stone is used to help you learn lessons, so you don’t repeat mistakes in your love life. Its deep sea green color is reminiscent of the subconscious, so it can assist in the manifestation of appropriate relationships in your life.

Ruby: The blood red light of the ruby helps to dispel feelings of discouragement and self-doubt and infuse your heart, mind and aura with love.

It can help you achieve a vibrant social life and attract the right friends.

Amethyst: This beautiful purple stone that helps you let go of past hurts and relationships. It will help you access the truth that will set you free.

As not everyone can afford rubies, sapphires and diamonds, there are also many semi-precious stones out there that also raise your vibration to attract prosperity.

Agate: strengthens your insight, promotes fidelity

Aquamarine: activates memory of past lives so we don’t repeat mistakes

Carnelian: dispels laziness, rage, jealousy, envy and fear

Garnet: love, devotion, commitment, gets rid of feelings of abandonment,

Hematite: transforms negative energy to the positive, attracts love

Jade: fidelity, devotion, love-drawing, lucid dreaming, intuition,

Lapis Lazuli: awareness, intuition, cures depression, love attracting

Mica: beauty for eyes and hair.

Moonstone: new beginnings, hoping, wishing, tenderness, compassion, mercy

Obsidian: grounding, protection, dispels obsessions, raises self-esteem

Onyx: banishes grief, increases self-control, making wise choices

Opal: brings out the best in you, acting from the heart, invoking visions, dreams,

Pearl: faith, charity, innocence integrity, spiritual guidance, increases fertility

Peridot: attracts friends, cleanses heart, happiness

Quartz (clear): balances energy field restores harmony, intuition,

Quartz (rose): attracts love, heals emotional wounds, opens heart center and clears skin

Quartz (smoky): dissolves negative energies, resentment, enhances self-esteem

Samantha’s excellent books on metaphysics and love are available on Amazon. You can also get a love reading from her on Kasamba. Just type Samantha Stevens into the search engine at kasamba.com and she will give you a love or dating psychic reading.